In a heart to heart conversation with a good friend, here is what I have concluded about relationships. It is really true what they say, "If they wanted to, they would." In a love relationship or friendship, there does not have to be a special occasion or reason to express appreciation, affection or even a phone call. One should not have to chase, beg for attention or seek validation. In this fast paced life of swipe right, swipe left, superficial social media world of texting and messaging, nobody has to do anything. Text relationships drag on and on with little to no human interaction. Terms like "hanging out" or "talking" to someone are terms for keeping options open with no real committment.
Chivalry seems to be dead. I realize this term may be out dated or outside our current cultural norms. But for the purpose of what I am trying to communicate, I mean chilvary; how a man shows how they cherish a woman with respect, honor and manners. Or about about good ole fashioned pursuing a woman; asking her on a date (and paying for it), opening her door, treating her to a wonderful time with NO expectation??
When is the last time you said, "I love you for no reason"? Or how have you shown them you hear and see them? Love does. Effort equals intention.
My pastor once told me in all his years of couples counseling he found that, "women want to be adored and men want to be respected."
Old school, real-deal men, WYA? You want a good woman? Adore her and she will give you respect. What if you sent her some flowers for no reason? What if it is...just because it's Wednesday?
*My name is Jennifer. I am a certified life coach. Yes, I took the classes, but most of what I learned comes from the library of my experience. As a widow of a 23 year marriage, a lot has changed in dating; but there are some things that stay the same. I help women see their value, worth, learn new communication skills, boundaries and help bring out their best.
**This blog is a work in progress on my series on love, dating and relationships. More to come.