Updated: Dec 12, 2022
As I sit here inside on a rainy Christmas morning, I am enjoying the warmth of my home, a sparkling tree and twinkling lights, I am pondering the "C" word. I have been captive inside my home for the last 4 days. Shockingly after 3 years of dodging the virus, I got Covid. I don't know how, what, when or where. The first few days I was wracked with fever, and body pain so severe, I could not see the end in sight. Wonderful people have reached out with prayers, offers of assistance and porch deliveries. Others questioned my vaccine schedule, some said it shouldn't be a big deal, some said the virus isn't real, while another lovingly reminded me how it's, "not fun being single and sick." As tears rolled down my face from physical discomfort, fear of financial insecurity of lost wages (due to not being able to see my clients), the powerlessness of laundry piling up, unopened/unpaid bills, writhing with pain and worry....the enemy was trying to take me down that vicious spiral of fear, anxiety and hopelessness. Worse yet, I could not join my entire family who traveled from near and far for my cousin's celebration of life. (He recently passed away from a tragic car accident.) Then, I heard a voice from heaven say, "you are not in CONTROL!" The "C" word. We can not control anything. If something is going to happen it is going to happen regardless. Trying to control things is a futile waste of time. We can not control the weather, the economy, people's opinions about us, our health or our safety despite our best efforts. Do you know what a miracle life is? We can not even control our next heart beat. We set our goals, plans and schedules but must remember to leave room for faith. The last few days I have been mindlessly scrolling the socials, movies and news...gathering more evidence of being out of control. This case of Covid drew me back to the Christmas story. Although I do not to intend to offend any of my clients, family or friends who do not ascribe to my faith and read this blog, for me, it is Christmas. The tree, the lights, the gifts, they are the fun and festive parts of this magical season. There is a message that often gets buried in the holiday buzz. The message of Christmas is Christ. Throughout all of my ups and downs in life it has always been my faith. We can not control anyone or anything. The only thing we can control is our faith and trust in God contingent upon our willingness to surrender, seek and grow. Merry Christmas. I pray you enjoy things that money can not buy and open the gift of faith, of love, of hope and true everlasting joy.